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Pride

August 29, 2016

Simon was a piece of shit. He was first told by an American teenager by the name of Damon. Damon, was an entrepreneur, which meant that Damon was a piece of shit with a direction to head towards. Damon was hounded by the inability to maintain a healthy relationship. His last relationship lasted 4 months, which was a record for the 19-year-old. Her name was Susan. Damon stole Susan from Simon. Susan was anxious with religion, which made her feel an enormous amount of guilt towards Damon and his sexual needs. Susan held her personal relationship with God above all else and in turn she threw religious vexations towards the only man who had ever cared enough to leave. Susan rue and lamented the turn of events, until she met Andy. Andy was selfish and bitchy, in other words a piece of shit. Susan felt relief around Andy, until his true colors came out and he raped her. She knew that she was in love. So, she allowed the abuse to continue. Then one day, Andy left Susan for a girl named Dana. Susan cried and felt that her life was coming down on top of her. The walls were closing in and she knew that everything she thought was wrong…

Eventually, Susan came to her senses. She felt the loss and all she wanted was the feel of a man on her. She cried and felt hollow with the words of the Lord falling on deaf ears. “God! Help me with my torment!” She cried out to the vast majority of atoms that were in the way of her cry for help. The little moment of psychological disorder that she faced seemed to vanish for a moment of clarity in which she saw every man for what they were. The piece of shit, the piece of shit, and the piece of shit. Love motioned towards a new direction, but Susan couldn’t escape the allure of her father’s essence. The waft of shit that emanated from these men turned Susan on and closed the gap on her clarity. The good men seemed too meek to Susan. She wanted to be someone. Well, someone who was with a person of interest. Her dream to be important sans the work. Daddy’s little girl shrugged and moved on towards bigger shits and worse men, because she doesn’t want what’s best for her, but what’s best for her interests. She prayed in vain, she lived for materials, and she lacked the minerals to be a person of interest. Best she could be is a person who fucked for a checking account.

35 was an interesting age for Susan. She was married to a struggling construction worker whom she despised. It wasn’t until she left a hotel room that Simon checked into that she felt unappreciated and in the wrong hands. Simon was now into the stock market and was now still a piece of shit, but Susan liked that about him. He knew what he wanted. Susan felt that her mind was never made up. She felt that she was on the verge of making a decision when the decision would be made for her. She felt hostility and resentment for the men in the world. They did this. They raped her. They made her feel inadequate and now what does she have to show for it? A bite mark on her shoulder. One that her old man, the construction worker would find and strike her for. She fantasized about a man, like Simon, coming over and murdering the fuck, but that was just a dream. The disconnect with the men in her life grew and she imagined taking a pair of scissors and stabbing her old man in the neck.

Shuck the past and endure the present. Susan left. She ran and left her old man alive and found a job waiting tables near Hemet. She grew accustomed to dope, but it was OK. She paid for her rent, she paid for clothes, she paid for her dope and she felt something that she never felt before.

Pride.

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From → Short Stories

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